I think i could be manipulative and controlling but i can't tell, i need some advice/help?

You do not have to lose her but you do have loosen the rein. You say you are unaware of the manipulation but that's not entirely true is it. You are using it because you have seen that it works. It may be entrenched in your brain as a solution but you are now using it to shift the responsibility for a failing relationship away from your self. Funny how if you cannot victimise, you so quickly become the victim. Your girlfriend needs consideration and space. Vow now, from this day on that you will wake each morning and seek to change your negative behaviour. Discuss your new intention with your girl, openly and honestly and take it from there.